About Alien Soup

Umwat Siten 16th did indeed invent a prototype model of a probe, but it was an early Undulating wave device which was eventually taken off the probe market because it caused severe undulating fever not to mention chronic naughty bit cramps. The device you mentioned in your post is actually the Undulator 49G-642A-14, and in no way can it be compared to a fully functioning and finely calibrated Uberprober*.

The REAL pulsation formula for Umwap's faulty device was/is as follows:

nn + 16Li ---> Tn + 41 He X 397.00031784559

nn + 17Li ---> Tnn' + 41He + nn X 66.00000217742775

You might be able to fool an amateur with lies and bogus figures, Sentinel, but any experienced probe specialist (like myself) can see thru your ruse immediately. Nice try though.

And as for the Rigel 12 World Press article...you neglected to tell the readers that you have posted the front page headlines from Rigel 12's largest alien tabloid, which is only read (and written) by deformed mutants with small human-sized brains and even smaller naughty bits.

Trosa Smparks has never even seen an Uberprober* let alone been probed with one. She's always telling some kind of lie to get her name in the tabloids, and this is no different than all the other times. She's a very unstable sick individual and is to be pitied rather than made fun of in this way. I am not surprised that you would do such a thing however.

The explosion of Chi Chumbottom has been ruled a suicide by the authorities who determined she locked herself in the bathroom and swallowed 40 slime-covered laxative grenades. She was upset over the loss of her pension from the dry cleaner company where she had worked for 50 years.

Tibur Tibitty was the victim of foul play at the hands of three unscrupulous alien physicians who were attempting to perform an experimental unauthorized slime liposuction procedure that went horribly wrong mainly due to a power surge which reversed the suction flow thereby filling her body full of slime instead of removing it. The three doctors also perished in the horrendous slime explosion. Let's get the facts straight here Sentinel and stop trying to turn Ripley and the others against me with your tabloid lies and phony accusations.

 

Humans man humans dang it HUMANS oh man do you hear yourselves talk you know what I just for this I might invade your planet today

 

Your input is needed Light. How could light help these two aliens who are head strong and subborn.

 

Not Light lighting *gives rose lunar whip*I'm only letting you borrow it for today

 

I am honored light, thank you.

Alright you two stubborn, thick skulled, pickle pusher aliens. I am holding this lunar whip. If you two don't get along with each other I will have to use it on both of you...and believe me this will hurt.

Look obviously you are both from different planets, or from the same planet with different ideas. I'm not saying thats not good, but isn't there something that the both of you do agree on?

 

Humans :blah:

 

I really didn't get to use the light whip on these two aliens. Do I need to give this back to you today light?

 

Schizander you have not answered my question. If I blow up my house and make a tunnel where as you stated you will be waiting with your space ship, then how will I be able to take care of alien children?

Are you planning to build me a new house?

 

Rosey, I think the idea is for all of us to live in one giant commune. That way we can live as one big happy pickled family. Just think of it....having Schizy's children, and living among "our" people.....I think I will go pack my bags now.

 

Well then Ripley that would indeed make more sense. I mean all he had to do was say that. I will wait for schizander's response. If you are correct Ripley then I would be glad to join the alien commune.

 

Dang it humans what the hecks you issue

 

I fear that Sentinel has taken Shizy back to their home planet! I haven't had a probing in a week! I'm going through withdrawals! HELP! ! !

 

Oh my poor dear delusional Human Female! You and Rosebud are both suffering from the withdrawl of Alien contact. I would recomend you attend AAA meetings. Perhaps after a few AAA {Alienating Aliens Anonymous} would help you wean off your dependence on Alien contact.

I offer my help in this matter. I hate to see you poor Mall Walking, SUV Driving, Gold Card Carrying Soccer Moms dependent on Alien Contact. The worst kind of contact the green ickle pickle.

Let me help you!


















































































































vvc vc

 

Do not worry about the good doctor he is very safe and comfortable in his new time stasis recovery cell. In a few thousand years he will arrive back on his home planet.

PS; I disconected his pickle and will be autioning it off to the highest bidder at the next International Alien Auction and Bed & Breakfast Weekend. Human females are not allowed to bid off course.

 

Take your time

HUMANS

 

Well Sentinel, if Dr. Schizy isn't going to be around, perhaps I can take your hand and let you lead the way. I'm going through such bad withdrawals, that I need SOMETHING! Please help me. I'm just a sad pathetic earth female, that has become addicted to probing, and I don't know what to do.

If I can't get in contact with Schizy, I guess I will have to take your word. Please don't fail me.

 

Humans

 

Light let me enlighten you on the purpose of this thread.

We have aliens who belong to this site. They live among us, in hiding. Their soul purpose is the procreate their species. There are several ways that they accomplish this mind enhancing idea on the females of this planet.

First they can persuade us verbally on their demise and hopefully a few will come through willingly with out hesitation.

Another way would be at the local wallymart store. By using the ATM machine and if your female, this machine will spray a mist containing alien DNA therefore impregnating you with alien sperm.

Now these aliens do so love the gold card, suv, mall walking, soccer moms. Don't ask me why, I think it might be their motto.

I have known these aliens for a very long time. They have so many women with alien children that they had to open up a commune called the poontang ranch. *I think that's the name of it* So you see with in a few years this planet will be inhabited by aliens.

This is my purpose. Knowing this, we have to accept that aliens are here to stay. That they have every right to be here. That they are NOT to be experiement or killed for being who they are.

I could go on light...but that is just the general idea so far.

 

It appears that our resident Aliens, are MIA.

Oh where oh where have my aliens gone, oh where oh where can they be???
Are they probing at the mother ship? Are they sitting in a hot slimey green sauna? Are they looking at other planets for more intelligent life? Ohhhhh how I miss my aliens, won't you please come back to meeeee? :tongue:

 

Maybe now you understand how you can not trust these horny, pickle wielding Green Alien's. He has addicted you to an unregistered uberpickle and now has left you hi and dry fighting the withdrawals. You are no doubt in the first stage of uberwithdrawl, an urgent unrelenting need to be probed. Next will come the uberroids a hemeriod the size of a vw bug will appear within hours causing great distress and embarrassment followed by the uberimplosion were overnight your body implodes upon itself leaving only a green stain on your sheets for your loved ones to find.

Worry not my coquettish Aphrodite. I shall not let you suffer the distress of uberwithdrawl. I offer you salvation in the form of the Sentinel Staff of life.
I have set up your Staff meeting for midnight tonight. Please come 20 minutes early to fill out appropriate paper work. I must also warn you that once you have had Sentinels Staff of Life all other Alien conjugation seems rather listless at best.

You may bring rosebud if you like.