About Alien Soup

I am in no way affiliated with the pootang ranch. That sorded Alien whore house was under sole ownership of OK57 a corporate entity out of the rigel 2 system were these pickle packing aliens originate from.

Rosebud You know I am but a friend of all mankind and I strive only to protect the mall walking, SUV driving, Gold Card Carrying Soccer Moms.

 

Oh...well good luck with that

HUMANS Beware

 

The good doctor has been returned to his home planet to face the music. His pickle decomissioned. He will bother not another human women. I accept your gratitude.

 

say it isn't soooo :bawl:

Set me up for an appointment Sentinel. I guess I will have to give your shaft, I mean staff of life a try. You were right about the roids, I don't think its at bursting point yet, but I better get to your office NOW before it does.

 

I am sure that you can not get rid of our alien friend so easily sentinel. For shnizander is a crafty, silver tongued, manipulator. If you sent your guards to capture him and take him back to your planet, I think you are in for quite a surprise. Go ahead and call the prision that you thought you locked him up in. I have a feeling he never made it there.

 

Well today is a special day for our good friendly alien Schizander. For today is his birthday.

Happy Birthday my good friend and hope you have a special day indeed. :bloons2: :birthday: :toot: :party1: :blowout:

 

Happy Birthday Schizy! I'll give you my special birthday lap dance!
>In her best Marilon Monroe inpersination<
Happy Birthday, Mr. alien
Happy Birthday, to yoou
happy Birthday, Mr. alien
Happy Birthday, to you

 

humans make me :hurl: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke:

 

Not so fast, Ripley...I'm not dead yet...just delayed by a certain IP (SBC) which accidentally disconnected my DSL line by mistake 2 weeks ago and just got around to reconnecting me about fifteen minutes ago after 10 phone calls and about 5 tech reps from India, but finally I got some nice woman from the USA who got me back online in about 10 minutes. It was all a simple typo (according to them)....

Sooooooooo, it looks like you will not be switching over to this Sentinel entity after all...or will you? And after all I have done for you...those late night probe sessions....the free Twinkies....this proves human females cannot be trusted...but I already knew this...

 

Thank you, Rosebud...yes it was my birthday and yes I did have a wonderful day and yes I have been reconnected to the internet after being internetless for two weeks. I suspect it was not a simple typo on their part but an intentional act designed to prevent me from carrying out my official duties as a certified alien probe specialist. I have the names and addresses of those responsible and they will be abducted and thoroughly probed immediately.

 

Ripley....tonight....midnight....your place....Uberprober*.....bring donuts.

 

So glad you are back Schizander. Sentinel told us that he brought you back to your home planet, where you were interrogated in front of an alien tribunal and fined for probing to many females for the allotted few that you were to obtain.

Say it isn't so Schizander.

I know that Sentinel is looking out for your best interests...but are you really in this predicament? What a way to celebrate your birthday, behind bars.

 

Humans

 

Sorry to here about your "acidental" communication Glitch may Dear Doctor.

My how could such a thing happen?

 

Haven't seen you in a long time Schizander, are you off in space cruising around?

 

Oh Schizy! I don't know where I am! I promised Sentinel I would meet him, and I've been blacked out ever since! I only regained sobriety a few moments ago. Forgive me for being so stupid to believe him. :oddgrin: I fear I'm in grave danger!

 

I'm beginning to believe that earth women simply cannot be trusted. I leave Alien Soup for a couple of weeks and what happens? You start kissing up to this Sentinel character who is not a real alien and and he has little or no probe experience. This rejection experience has already begun to have a negative impact my self esteem to the point that...well, to be honest with you, Ripley, I've seriously been thinking I should maybe return all those nice Christmas presents that I bought for you and Rosebud when I was out of your galaxy...and they were all such lovely gifts too, and expensive. Too bad I suppose. Let this be a lesson.

 

I'm sorry Schizy

 

I see you got off with probation Doctor Probe. Damn Intergalactic courts are to dam lienent now a days. Well at least they took away you retched home made umberprobe. I heard you made a few friends in the *Pokey {excuse da pun}

Seems ole Buba wants you to keep in touch and maybe set a little housekeeping when he gets out. I took the liberty of giving him earths co-ordinate's and your ships TCAS # so he can look you up upon release.
No need to thank me.............

Now you know the terms of your probation are to stay away from these earth women.
There nothing but trouble and will only cause
you to violate.Don't worry Doc I will take care
of them for you alone. Ripley has all ready been
*SeN Ta tion Al ized* and Rosebuns is next.
I suggest you find a hobby Doc.

 

Ohhh both our aliens are back with presents and surprises for me and Ripley, how wonderful.

Now both Ripley and I have been very good girls. We have not strayed away from you aliens. We have been true to the faith and want what is coming to us. So if you have presents for us...or if you want some alone time for interrogation purposes on what we two girls have been doing while you aliens have been away, then we will meet with you.